Naomi's word for Jesus Wants Me for a Sunbeam

Jesus wants me for a SunBeep!

to shine for Him each day.

In every way try to please Him, 

at home, at school, at play.

A SunBeep! A SunBeep!

Jesus wants me for a SunBeep!

A SunBeep! A SunBeep!

I'll be a SunBeep for him.

Hysterical!!

Tagged by Chanda - so much pressure because she is so much more interesting than me! =o)

How To Play This Game of Tag:

Post these rules on your blog. List: 3 joys, 3 fears, 3 goals, 3 current obsessions/collections, 3 facts about yourself. Tag 5 people at the end of your post by leaving their names. Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog!

Joys:
1. My two little girls - who are both still my babies even though Naomi is almost 4!
2. My husband. He's the only person I can talk to - pretty much ever! He has a very quirky personality that is unbeknownst to MOST.
3. Parties of course! But mostly during the planning phases - so maybe I enjoy planning or organizing more. 

Fears:
1. Being alone even though I'm surrounded by a bunch of people. Ya know, having acquaintances but no real friends.
2. My children growing up - the idea that really bad things could happen in their lives. I'm afraid someone will steal them or harm them beyond repair. Also, what sort of neuroses will I be passing on to them?
3. The thought of dying a long and painful death caused most particularly by a disease - especially the thought that maybe I could be dying already. Cancer to be specific.

Goals:
1. Finish a degree or perhaps a few! I'm trying to convince myself that it would be ok to be self educated - its not working!
2. Be a better mom - be more involved and plan really fun things for them to do so they aren't bored of me all of the time.
3. Lose weight and get fit. Brian says it should just be get fit - but I have to lose the weight before I can get fit.

Current obsessions:
1. Planning Gwen and Naomi's birthday parties.
2. Focusing on reading more - I've got quite a list to cross off.
3. My calling at church  - Visiting Teaching Leader - its ALL that I think about when I'm not planning the girls parties.
4. mypyramid.gov, I'm trying to work into all of our lives the proper portions and correct foods for each of our ages and stages. It is so hard to coordinate 3 varying food schedules and quantities!

Facts:
1. Someday I want to be known for making the best cupcakes - that is taking some doing, hopefully someday! I refuse to make a cake out of a box!
2. I eat, sleep, and breathe decorating in all sorts of scenarios. I'm currently redoing the girls room for as cheap as possible! I wish I knew more about designing houses because I really want to have my dream home all mapped out for whenever that time comes.
3. I'd love to learn more about photography! 

Let's see I tag...Rachel, Janell, Chelle, Beth, Janine

There is nothing I love more than a party!!!

As some of you may know, I love parties! Its a decorating outlet for me! I'm too poor to redecorate my house per season so....I plan parties! I get so excited for holidays too! Just the idea that Halloween is 3 months away sends tingles all over me! Then Christmas! Whoo! But in just a week now is Gwen's party! So I have already started the decorations. 

These are the flowers I will be placing around the house for color.

Everyone gets to take home a favor! Two Lindor chocolate truffles inside!

I'm trying really hard to keep myself from putting up the streamers now! haha! I know I'd get tired of them by the party if I did it now. Last year Halloween was up for an entire month and I was itching to take it all down - mostly so I could put up the Thanksgiving stuff!! I never do get tired of the Christmas stuff though - that should stay up all year - it makes the home so warm and cozy feeling!

Some about the little sweeties!

Gwen has a new hobby. She knows how to get her own food. She goes into our pantry and pulls out a box of whatever she might want. Usually she will just shove her hand in and eat that, but lately we have been getting this...

The other day she decided she wanted a granola bar, but she can't open them by herself so she crawled over to me with bar in hand, stands up next to me, and throws it at me! It was a pretty hard throw too. I didn't realize at the time exactly what she wanted so I just set it down. She picked it up again and threw it at me again! We laughed to realize how persistent she is about things. At least she knows what she wants.

She still is not walking - though I do catch her taking 4-5 steps by herself from the couch to the chair. She won't do it when people are watching. I know its still within normal time frame - its just frustrating because Naomi walked at 10 months! 

Naomi has been wanting a Tutu lately. Sesame Street did a segment on ballerinas. I told her she could have one for her birthday, but Daddy thought it just wasn't fair to make her wait until her birthday for a Tutu. So here is Naomi in her Tutu.

You can't really tell, but I cut Naomi's hair! Its all straight across at the bottom, and its still WAY too long! But at least its trimmed up - boy was it terrifying!

Funny Hiding Places

Gwen is learning how to color!

We have all been quite sick this week. It seems to be that none of us want to be all that close to each other. So the girls have found some interesting places to hide in the house!

Naomi sits on top of the couch.

Gwen plays with her toys BEHIND the toy boxes.

My Educational Options

These are the things I am thinking about doing - educationally speaking. 

The easiest option - yet the one I want to do the LEAST is to take my 3-4 online courses and revise an essay on Victorian Poetry that I wrote 6 years ago. This would finish up my Liberal Arts Degree at SVU. I, however, do not WANT a liberal arts degree anymore!

-Or-

I could start a new major. Here are the ones I would possibly want to do. I know there is no common theme between them!

Physiology and Developmental Biology

Interior Design/Decorating

Architecture

Anthropology/Archaeology

Psychology

So I just found a program at the Art Institute of Pittsburgh that they off entirely through online courses! The very good thing about it (besides being online) is that I could do a one year Residential Planning Diploma. Residential Planning would allow me to be a Interior Designers assistant. The beauty of that is that if in one year I want to continue into the Interior Design Bachelor all of the classes would count towards the Bachelors! So....maybe that is what I'll do! Then depending on how I like it in one year I could continue onward with it - or stop and then in a few years pick up the Developmental Biology major wherever we might be! Cool!

'What Movie do You belong in?' at QuizGalaxy.com

What do you remember?

Here are the directions:

1. As a comment on my blog, leave one memory that you and I had together. It doesn't matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember!

2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty funny to see the responses. If you leave a memory about me, I'll assume you're playing the game and I'll come to your blog and leave one about you. If you don't want to play on your blog, or if you don't have a blog, I'll leave my memory of you in my comments.

I made this!

I want the girls to wear these headbands for Gwen's Birthday Party! I thought of buying them for like $20, but then I rethought and this was definitely under $1!

Both wearing their cute headbands!

Gwen being sneaky!

This is what happens when you tell Naomi to look into the camera!

Gwen was just laying on pooh and watching the TV! She's a crack up!

What to do?

I'm feeling very very depressed right now. I feel so worthless! I would really like to go back to school to get a degree - unfortunately I'd prefer to get one that is not Liberal Arts. I've narrowed down my choices a bit, but I have no idea how I'd work out the scheduling of me going to classes, how I'd be able to finish (since we are moving in one year, I couldn't finish a degree here), and how I'd fit in not only the course load but most importantly all the homework and reading (because yes I do ALL the reading for my classes!). 

I feel like our life is very one sided. I feel like I'm doing everything I can possibly do to push Brian along, but I haven't gotten a single push (or maybe even the opposite). I just don't see that I would ever get the support with the kids and home stuff to be able to do what I'd like to do. 

A certain person who I will not name (and its not Brian) often refers to me as a housewife or just a mom - it hurts me so badly because I feel so categorized, sorted and just left there. There is nothing more to me! I hate that I feel like its my job to prove the opposite. 

Brian talks like he wants me to go back to school, but what is really sad is that I hear in his voice that he doesn't believe I can  do it. Or maybe its that he doesn't want me to because it'd be a lot harder on him. It makes me feel like he thinks I'm dumb - I didn't get into BYU and he did! There's a lot of bitterness there - probably a lot of why I hate the place! I have a feeling he thinks I still wouldn't get in even though my transfered GPA is a 3.52. 

Why can't I just be happy with where I am? Why do I feel like I have to strive for more? Is it just because I don't feel like I'll ever get opportunities to do things for myself? Its amazing how unloved you can feel when you feel like you are considered a lower life-form (even if Brian doesn't, I know some people who do!)

Gwen's Birthday Invitations

Almost 3 weeks left until Gwen's First Birthday!!! Crazy! Here is her Invitation prototype.

Date and time are still to be determined!

Two weeks in review

We have been quite busy lately. On June 26th my mom and dad came into town. We had a nice time chatting and visiting. That friday we went to the zoo. Naomi loved it and I think learned quite a bit more about animals. Her favorite was the elephants. This is her riding the merry-go-round.

Gwen and I sat and chilled in the shade while Naomi rode the giraffe.

On Monday we went to the Earth Science Museum and the Monte L Bean Museum's on campus. I must admit they have some pretty cool stuff! Naomi enjoyed every minute of it! 

On July 2nd, Brian's sister Chanda and her husband Morgan came to visit us with their two kids Maeve and Ruby. They were visiting the US from South Africa and were so nice to travel around the entire country to see everyone! Naomi and Gwen loved having Maeve and Ruby around all of the time. Naomi is still asking when they are coming back "home". The best day was definitely fourth of July. Unfortunately I was dumb and did not take ANY pictures. Hopefully Chanda and Morgan will post some once they get settled back home. We drove up into the canyon and grilled some hot dogs. The girls got to go with Chanda and Morgan on a "hike". Later in the day Uncle Tracy and Uncle Timmy joined us. We found a cute little creek near where we were grilling so the girls and Brian and Morgan played for hours! They were all soaked through and dirty! That evening (almost 11pm) we watched the Stadium of Fire Fireworks. They were ok except that ALL of the children were very grumpy and sleepy. It was really nice to just sit and talk and laugh with them while they were here. Its nice to get to know them better too!!

As for me, I am really enjoying my new calling as Visiting Teaching Leader. I'm constantly working on it and trying to find how we can improve things! Its really fun! 

This is a random pictures of Gwen. She decided to take all of the food out of the bottom of our pantry and then climb on in. This is her on her way out because she saw me grab the camera. She was running to get to it!